Snakes and Samurai on a Plane

Lethal snakes have been released on board a commercial airliner. In the confusion, an executive of the Turner Broadcasting corporation and his entourage of evil samurai bodyguards take control of the plane, declaring martial law and forcing the pilot to land on a tiny, uninhabited island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. As the passengers mill around on the beach and tend to the wounded, the executive makes a speech commanding them all to "swear allegiance to Ted Turner." The samurai line them up and direct them to sexually service them or else be hacked to pieces.
One of the passengers is a lone samurai who happened to be flying on the plane with his two young children. He prays for forgiveness as he solemnly decapitates them with his katana in order to protect their honor. He does not weep.
Meanwhile, nurse Juliana Margulies explains to someone else that she has found a crate of Dubble Bubble bubble gum in the cargo hold, and she believes that it may be useful as an antivenom to treat snakebites. However, she is also concerned that the bubble gum may contain a "blood pox," which would be deadly.